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Holiday Hotel

from People We Can Never Meet by Carlos Danger

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lyrics

I sent you a soliloquy from the inside of the church bathroom
While the rest of my family is outside wondering who I'm talking to

I told you that when it comes to feeling anything for anyone I am cursed
And what you told me should've reassured me but it made me feel much worse
You said I'm far from the first person that this has happened to
Then you name some other people who've accomplished things I'll never do
It's so bafflingly easy to make me feel special, and I guess that's the root of it all
While many men live in search of fluttering heartbeats, mine causes far more problems than it solves

And this is the moment when I realize
I'm more scared of watching people grow up than I am of watching them die
It's much easier to preserve a memory and just let them fade away
Than it is to let something good never be the same

Even if it's changing into something else good
I'll make the same mistakes that I said I never would

Now we're in Josh's basement and I never want this to end
It's just me and my friends and our thoughts down on canvas and paper and tape and skin
And every awful year that's passed has never ended with quite as much hope as this one
I'll just sit back and relax and wait for myself to come undone

And this is the moment when I start to think
That what I want and what I need are definitely not different things
If I can keep my mouth shut I'll remain more comfortable than ever
And maybe I will finally have a basis for these endeavors

And I won't care what she is or is not telling me
And I will succeed at them, with or without jealousy

credits

from People We Can Never Meet, released April 7, 2017

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Carlos Danger New Haven, Connecticut

Emo pop from New Haven, CT.

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